What are you thinking with me?
Why do you lie me?
Why do you seduce me to love you?
Why do you make me as your lust product?
What is relationship did you give to me?
What is your heart?
Who is Kate?
Answer now bitch!
“Praewa!! What happened with you?” Roxanne said when Praewa just came to her home and Praewa blamed unconsciously. Come on Praewa. Keep calm and talked with Roxanne. She could help Praewa, but Praewa cried with her sadness and she didn’t stop to receive her melancholy away from her. Her flashbacks made her pained in her heart a lot.
I am lesbian. I love girls. I never love all men. I don’t know why but I feel safe when I stay with girls. I don’t know who is my dad, but I hate all men who try to love me. Manaw is my real love. Manaw is my real love!!!!
Finally, Praewa remembered her story in grade 9. That time she was raped by many guys due to she loved to break many male’s heart. She was so beautiful and she didn’t care anything, but her beauty was her real curse that had stuck to her forever. That time many male students wanted to have sex with her. She still kept her virginity but finally, she couldn’t.
Someday her friend invited Praewa to drink water due to that time she felt thirsty due to working out. Praewa thought that wasn’t weird much because friend that was giving water was her best friend. Praewa drank it and she felt asleep with long time. She felt herself again when she was at another one’s bedroom that decorated very strange. At the ceiling, there were many stellar with fluorescent and black light neon. That was so trippy. The worst thing that happened to Praewa was… She was tying with handcuffs and looked like jerk male came to Praewa and tried to rape Praewa. Then raping failed. Some butch helped her from the sadness. She was Manaw.
“Don’t worry girl. I save you.” Manaw said.
That was a reason why she felt in love with butch, not male. Male people had many lust to had sex with her, but they didn’t want to be in a relationship. One reason was… She was so really beautiful!
“Are you OK?”
“Hey!!! Praewa. What’s wrong with you?”
Roxanne still asked her adopted sister before she hugged Praewa. Now she and Praewa was at Praewa’s room. Praewa didn’t say anything, but she still cry from her melancholy. That was really hurt stories she had ever knew. Actually, Roxanne’s being raped stories already knew and this made Praewa felt bad forever. 6 years later after that bad stories, Roxanne couldn’t wipe it all.
“That being raped again?” Roxanne asked Praewa, but Praewa shook her head. That was “NO”.
“Can you tell me who tease you?” Roxanne still asked.
“Roxanne…” Praewa started to say and she opened her body. “My heart is broken.”
“Broken!!!? Who broke up you?” Roxanne asked. “That butch?”
“He used me as his product.” Praewa hugged to Roxanne and started to tell her sad story that just happened. “The product of lust. I don’t know why many guys want to contact me for having sex? My boyfriend who have been butch sold me as a whore.”
“Whore?” Roxanne confused and interjected immediately. “What the fuck? So that time you were being raped for 4 months ago…. “
“Yes. I was sold to be a whore.” Praewa revealed the truth to Roxanne and cried in same time. Roxanne felt worried very much. She didn’t do anything well as hugging and giving spirit to her adopted sister. Praewa was crying relentlessly.
“Don’t worry, Praewa. Stay with me. You’re my great sister.” Roxanne said and she scrubbed Praewa’s head. Now Praewa felt safe when she was staying with Roxanne who took care her. Roxanne didn’t want Praewa to cry more than usual. She ever felt about heartbroken moment was so really bad. Actually, Praewa never loved someone easily, but she loved that butch. Looked like that butch (named Manaw) was so really clever. She pleased Praewa to love her simply. Then Roxanne embraced Praewa’s arm and didn’t do anything more. She wanted Praewa to get out from the melancholy.
“Thank you Roxanne.” Praewa said and she still hugged Roxanne who was her adopted elder sister. Although Roxanne wasn’t her real elder sister, but she was kind and appropriate to be elder sister more than another one.
“Keep calm, Praewa. You’re not alone. Everyone must encounter disappointments. But many disappointments teach you to be greater person who will influence the future. In the world, there are appointments and disappointments. You can choose what is suitable to you.”
Praewa still cried and didn’t say anything. She remembered this day was same as the nightmare. This was the weirdest nightmare Praewa had ever seen. She trusted Manaw’s trustworthiness, but Manaw eliminated Praewa’s trustworthiness mercilessly until she fell herself to the floor and no spirit to do anything more. Roxanne thought that was so unusual. Praewa was clever with the relationship, but why!!!?
With doubting, Praewa and Roxanne still created and answered the questions that appeared inside their mind relentlessly. For third person’s view, some people saw to Roxanne and Praewa were crying, but actually, their heart was hurt and they need some help.
Meanwhile at Route 66, RCA.
Now Chris had permission to open musics at Route 66, RCA. Actually, looked like Chris’s penalty cancelled due to no reason to give more penalty and everything was misunderstanding. Now at Route 66, there were many people who enjoyed Chris’s music mixing. Everyone danced and jumped together. Although Tingting was dead and no MC to help him, but Chris could show lonely. He open music for his MC, Tingting.
Because DJ was Chris’s job. He got profit from this job and he enjoyed it a lot. Many fanclubs were surrounding him to selfie or get Chris’s signature. He was so popular and lovable on ever night he appeared. He didn’t dress with mysterious costume, but he was so simple that everyone recognized him easier than another DJ who was really artisic and very deep to know what were they thinking. Chris’s mixing songs was really fantastic. Everyone who heard Chris’s mixed songs had to jump and dance with their happiness. Until nightlife people said “Chris is he door of heaven.”
“Ladies and gentlemen.” Chris said to everyone in Route 66. “Although I don’t have Tingting who is MC, but I have my fans who support me. Tingting was gone away from this world and she would like to go to her place. I couldn’t seize her from the death and I support her although she was dead. I missed her very much. Because Tingting has been your love and me, so this song is a song for Tingting who make my mixing songs to have a true meaning.”
Chris remembered and missed Tingting a lot. But she was gone. Chris’s fanclubs felt sad too that Chris mentioned about Tingting again. Tingting was Chris’s one of the most important girl. She was so sexy and she will be in a relationship with Chris. That accident, it couldn’t predict when it would appear. Chrs ever knew that time he saw Tingting who was crashed on TV, Chris felt sad very much and he came to hospital, but finally, Chris couldn’t save Tingting’s life and she was dead painfully.
“Chris… If I will be gone from this world, I want to say… ‘I love you.'” Tingting said last sentences when Chris visited her at patient room at hospital. Tingting held Chris’s hand and she didn’t want to let Chris went away from her, but she couldn’t. She said “I love you”, that was really appreciated for her a lot. Tingting’s tears dropped down to the bed. When Tingting finished to say, Tingting couldn’t tolerate her pain inside her body. She gave up and died with holding Chris’s hand and she smiled to Chris.
“Tingting…” Chris said to Tingting and tried to shake Tingting’s body. “No… Tingting. You can’t die. Please stay with me. Please!!!”
“Chris… What are you waiting for?” Some audiences shouted from dance floor. That woke Chris to see the real world again. Chris saw around him and he just thought what he should do next.
“Chris. More songs!!!” ladies audiences said to Chris until Chris said to audiences who were so crazy and needed more songs. Chris was so very popular until he didn’t have his time.
“OK. I’m sorry. I just missed Tingting. This song is the song Tingting loved a lot. You may love it. Please jump togeter. Are you ready?”
“Are you ready?”
“Again! Are you ready?”
“OK!!! Let’s dance baby!!” Chris said and he started to open new songs from his playlist at DJ panel. Everyone danced crazily because this song was the best song from Tingting. It was dancing songs.
“Tingting love this song a lot. Please dance extremely. It makes Tingting feels happy in the heaven.” Chris still cheereed audiences to dance together. With lights, glitters, beautiful girls and handsome mens, they made this time at Route 66 to be precious temporally. No chatting via smartphone. They interested only people, atmosphere in Route 66 club only.
Although someone did perver things, such as using ecstasy drugs or naked their body to touch and aroused together, but that picture overall was so beautiful things.
It was worth if someone who loved rave and came to Chris’s zone. Now Chris finished opening songs. He said something before he leaved from DJ stage.
“Thank you very much. You’re my friend who joined my attention. See you again, Christo!”
Christo was name of Chris’s fanclub. Chris’s community was so big. They thought Chris was alive idol in this world. Christo(s) screamed relentlessly with their happiness. That made Chris felt appreciated although he didn’t have Tingting as his MC.
Then Chris walked to downstairs to get out from DJ stage. Then someone called to him. Chris picked his Blackberry smartphone and saw to phone screen. Um… Dada Cupcake was calling to him. Chris received Dada’s calling.
“Hello Dada.” Chris said.
“Chris?” Dada asked. “Are you available?”
“Available? What?” Chris asked to Dada again.
“I want to know about Kate, Manaw’s girlfriend. I knew Kate was your ex-girlfriend.”
“Kate? Why do you want to know this?” Chris asked curiously.
“Kate will marry with Manaw.” Dada answered.
“Who is Manaw?”
“Butch who was Praewa’s lover.”
“Who is Praewa?”
“My close friend, but hey! Don’t ask a lot, so tomorrow do you available? My friend Zen, me and Praewa will want to know information about Kate. Who is she… or why Manaw love Kate a lot?”
Inside Chris’s heart, Kate was only his acquaintance, not more than friend forever. Perhaps he forgot how about Kate. But Dada wanted to know Kate’s information, so he denied every tasks and appointed to Dada immediately.
“Dada.” Chris said.
“What?” Dada asked.
“Tomorrow you bring your friend to Starbucks at Thonglor.” Chris appointed Dada.
“Yeah. See you tomorrow.” Dada said and hung up.
Although Chris’s body was at Route 66 that fulfilled with spotlight and nightlife people, but he tried to remember his time when he was in a relationship with Kate. That time was so luscious and sweet. Chris and Kate ever travel around Thailand. Most sweet time was when Chris and Kate traveled to Koh Phi Phi together. That time Chris took photos a lot. Kate grinned with her happiness. Koh Phi Phi was really beautiful and many travelers decide to travel at this place.
Chris still remember that day. After he finished DJ job at Route 66, he came to his house at Thonglor at 3:00 AM. He opened the door and light bulb turned on immediately. That time was so asleep, but Chris tolerated to seek his photos that were taken with Kate. Luckily, he put at right place, so he could find it easily. He kept photos with Kate at some wood chest. Then he opened it and looked like Chris could remember everything when he was in a relationship with Kate successfully.
Many photos he took, that was so peaceful. Looked at that dry rose from first love, it still gave the meaning of love. Many photos he took with hugging with Kate were very warm. Chris picked photos when he took at Full Moon party, Koh Pha Nguan and he said something.
“Kate. Do you remember that day?”
Next day at Starbucks, Thonglor.
“Hi Chris.” Dada came to Starbucks coffee shop at Thonglor with Praewa, Toto, Zen and she greeted to Chris who was sitting. Chris waved his hand to greet Dada. Today Dada wore very cute costume that he never saw due to he met Dada only at nighttime. She was same as Korean girls. Praewa was too. She was so cute and not sexy much.
“Dada. Look like you are really cute.” Chris complimented to Dada first. “As same as Korean girl.”
“Yeah.” Toto seized Dada to say. “She is same as Ulzzang in Cyworld. Actually…”
Dada smashed with her elbow to Toto because she was pungent with something. Then Chris greeted to Praewa by raising his hand to call Praewa.
“Hi Praewa.” Chris said.
“Hello Chris.” Praewa said. “I’m so sorry about Tingting.”
“Don’t worry.” Chris said. “She is already at the heaven.”
“Do you know more about Kate?” Dada started to ask Chris. Chris smiled and he put bag to table in Starbucks coffee shop before he opened his bag to pick some photos that took with Kate.
“Wow!! That is so sweet.” Praewa interjected when she saw Chris’s photo that were so sweet with Kate. That made Praewa felt jealous a little. Praewa saw Chris’s photos that took at Koh Phi Phi and she smiled lonely.
“What are you smiling?” Dada asked to Praewa.
“I want my lover makes sweet moment as this.” Praewa answered to Dada.
“That is last year ago.” Chris said. “Now she hasn’t stayed with me.”
“Don’t think a lot, Chris.” Toto said to Chris. “You will see next lover who love you.”
“I think my elder sister Roxanne is suitable for Chris.” Praewa gave opinion. Chris smiled and said. “Hey!”
“Hahaha.” Chris laughed shyly.
“Actually, Roxanne said about Chris with many times.” Praewa said. “She had secret admiring to you.”
Chris didn’t say anything more. He felt surprised when his friend, Roxanne loved him. But he still focused to say about Kate to Dada.
“Today Dada appoints me to say about Kate. I picked many photos that ever took with Kate.” Chris said about many photos he took with Kate before he arranged many photos from first time he met to last photo he took before he understood Kate was died at Sanctuary club.
“You met Kate first at Funky Villa?” Dada asked about first photo Chris took with Kate. Dada saw that picture and she could remember that background in Funky Villa.
“Yep.” Chris answered. “That time I didn’t see you, Dada.”
“Because my dad’s manager managed Funky Villa.” Dada told reason.
“I unexpectedly met Kate when she was drunken. Her friends didn’t help her. So I sent her to her home after Funky Villa was closed.”
“Really?” Praewa asked.
“When I brought to Kate’s home, she blew vomit out extremely. She felt asleep a little. After that she saw to me but finally, she slept again. Actually, Kate in that time was so stink from alcohol smell.”
“I think Kate was competing to drink alcoholic drink.” Dada said. “But you’re so gentle, Chris.”
“Thanks.” Chris said. “That night I didn’t have sex with Kate. After I sent Kate to her home, I came to my residence, but that night I got Kate’s phone number. Next day, I started to flirt Kate by calling to her. She was so nice.”
“How long do you flirt Kate?” Toto asked to Chris.
“3 months.” Chris answered. “When I and Kate learned habit together successfully, I decided to confess my love to Kate, but looked like Kate wasn’t arrogant much due to she felt in love with me too, so I and Kate were in a relationship together. After that…” Then Chris picked his photos when he took with Kate at the time of traveling, such as going to Koh Pha Ngan, Koh Phi Phi, Pattaya, Nightclubs in Bangkok, etc.
“That is really cute. But why did you dismiss Kate?” Praewa asked. “Or you love another girl?”
“I’m not adultery.” Chris answered. “I misunderstood Kate was alive. Last time I met her was at Sanctuary club. I tried to help her, but firefighters bounced me. That time I thought she was dead. Finally, she appeared again at Motor Show 2009.”
“Huh?” Dada asked.
Looked like Zen had to say something to Chris. “I thought this story is unusual. Looked like Kate wanted to be in a relationship with you because that was Kate’s secret job. That is negative thinking but don’t worry.”
Dada hesitated to Zen’s opinion. “If Kate do this really, Kate will be similar as a whore.”
“I worry Kate very much. Manaw shouldn’t be trusted.” Zen said.
“Zen, Dada.” Praewa said. “I’d like to revenge Manaw.”
“Huh?” Toto said. “Why?”
“Don’t you know love very much can turn to hate very much?” Praewa asked.
“Chris. When you have been in a relationship with Kate, how do you feel weird something?” Dada asked.
“Maybe.” Chris said. “Sometime she called to someone. But she said she is talking to my friend. I’d like to check her phone, but she locked her phone.”
“And you still decided to be in a relationship with her continuously?” Dada asked.
“Yeah.” Chris answered. “Although I knew who always called to Praewa all of time. Finally I knew that was a butch. But I never fear because I think she is Kate’s friend. After Sanctuary club was burnt, I never contact to her.”
“After Kate was dead, did you go to funeral?” Zen asked.
“Yeah.” Chris said.
“Dada.” Zen called to Dada. “I ever came to Kate’s funeral with Praewa. Actually, I ever heard someone said about Kate. I wasn’t sure is it true? But inside Kate’s coffin, that wasn’t Kate.”
“So… Kate’s funeral is fake?” Dada asked to Zen.
“Maybe.” Zen didn’t sure. “I heard about inside coffin was …. died dog.”
Everyone excepted Zen interjected loudly inside Starbucks coffee. That was so unusual. If Kate wasn’t dead, so why Kate didn’t connect to Chris?